Lock the Door...Tight!

Respect People enough to provide Closure...

Closure: "...psychological term that describe an individual's desire for a firm answer to a question and an aversion toward ambiguity. The term "need" denotes a motivated tendency to seek out information."

No one likes to have things left undone, or watch a captivating movie but not see the end. In the same breath, most people need closure and they need a sense that the chapter has ended and they can move on. Unfortunately life plays in such a way that we are bound to have our fair share of cliffhangers. We will be faced with those inevitable situations where there can be no closure.

But what about those times when closure is possible but we either deny or are denied that luxury. What do we say or do then? I read somewhere that when a relationship ends, we should always do an autopsy of the relationship, this allows us to gain closure and step forward with an insight that facilitates improvements.

Sadly, there are some of us who are so closed up by fear and pride that we deny the people we care about, or once cared about, the right to closure. We fuss over things gone wrong and offer resolution in a dismissive and debilitative manner. We fail to see that not dealing with important matters can stifle us and others to the point of death. This death is slow, painful and to the eyes of the deniers it is invisible.

We have to stop denying ourselves and others of the relief closure brings. We have to stop accepting situations where closure is denied. So let us look at some of the ways in which we can get closure or give it.

1. Communication: This is KEY. We have to allow for free flow of interaction that allows for healthy expression. People need to feel comfortable to deal.

2. Interest: Sometimes all the card may be right but someone just doesn't 'feel' like it. Indifference has a way of making us look cold, so we need to be careful of that. We have to find it in ourselves to consider another person's feeling and not just shrug them off.

3. Understanding: This is very important as well when trying to seek closure. We don't all feel the same way about every situation, people are different and so are their reactions to the things that happen to them. You may not always agree on everything, so understanding is necessary when trying to move on.

When we don't have the sense that a chapter has ended or a door was closed, the same issue may repeat itself in different forms in our lives. There are some weeds in our relationship that stem from an issue we never really resolved or got over. So we have to decide that even if our hands get dirty, we will pull that weed out.

Advice & Beyond

@Looking_Within

Gratitude...All about Perception

Hey,

This isn't a long blog because it is really for emotional release.  A lot has happened in the past few days but I find that I am about to say 'Thank God' a lot more than I did before.

But the truth is, our lives could be significantly satisfying than it may be now with just a change in your mindset. For a man who lost all his money, he can thank God for life for the chance to build back twice as much.

We are blessed and highly favoured. The minute we lose sight of that, we lose the belief in the amazing Jesus Christ.

Never forget that and remember to say thank you, smile more and spread His goodness.

Advice & Beyond
@Looking_Within

Sanity

It is interesting how little things can mess with your sanity. Just when you got to a place of comfort and safety, something happens and shakes you.

I never thought I'd be back at the place where I am frightened from my sleep with the thought of someone standing over me.

But I may be shaken but not broken.  God is our keeper and guide.

Advice & Beyond
@Looking_Within

Where are you going?

Today I went to church for the first time this year...funny. Anywho, it was an experience that solidified my start to a better year.

The Gospel lesson spoke of the journey Joseph and Mary took to keep Jesus safe from Herod. The reverend tied this lesson of journey to that of the new year which should bring hope.

What are our future plans? How did we learn from the past year and the experiences we had?

She gave three lovely steps to moving forward...
1. Reflection
2. Regeneration
3. Resolution

We have to first reflect on the past in order to really make the best of the future. Reflect on the good and the bad in a way that allows for improvement in your existence and an appreciation of the chances we have.

We may not understand why bad things happen, but trust in the ways of God and the purpose these experiences hold.

A new year is a new chance for regeneration, for learning, perfecting and overall development. It is a time for hope not regret, because we have a chance at change.

So after you have reflected and felt regenerate, make the commitment and write down your resolutions. Make an effort to fulfill them so that this year may bring growth and not the same old, same old.

So I leave you with that message of new beginnings and pray you make full use of the chance to make it better and fulfill your purpose.

Advice & Beyond
@Looking_Within

My books

Going to start my heavy reading again...

Luke 17 : 11 - 19....Thankfulness

A Lesson of Gratitude...

"As He entered the village, ten lepers stood at a distance crying out, 'Jesus, Master, have mercy on us!' He looked at them and said, 'Go show yourselves to the priests.' And as they went, their leprosy disappeared.
One of them, when he saw that he was healed, came back to Jesus shouting, 'Praise God, I am healed!" He fell to his face down on the ground at Jesus' feet, thanking him for what he had done."


Gratitude is a wonderful and positive attitude. How can our lives have meaning if we do not count our blessings and give thanks to the one who blessed us? 

When we wake up in the mornings, we have more than enough to be grateful for, because that in itself is a wonderful blessing. Yes the day may not go the way you wanted, but something did go right. Jesus healed 10 lepers and only one came back to him to give thanks... One.


So let this be our lesson for today, gratitude. Say thank you when someone does something for you, helps you or is kind to you. Give God thanks for all your blessings and speak a positive attitude unto His people.

                                


Advice & Beyond
@Looking_Within

New Year

New Year...

Hey peeps, it has been a while since I placed my fingers on the letter keys and just left my feelings flow, so I figured now is a better time than any.

It is the New Year!!! So happy we could all live to see this year and all the wonders it has to offer. With that said, I like many others have written down the things I want to improve on for this year. I did this not because it is cliche or expected, but because I need to take control of my life and this is the way I know how.

What is the point in living if you don't feel fulfilled and satisfied at the end of the day? Why should the bad days take over and dominate your perspective? This was beginning to consume me, the bad days, the bad feelings, the "I can't be bothered anymore" until I started to lose interest in the things I love. So I decided that with the gift of a new year, I will change this and develop a better and healthier me, both inside and out.

I have included my friends in this as well, because it is always easier to make changes when the people around you allow you to. Growth is easy with support, so I want to be there for them as much as I want them there for me.

So I challenge you my few readers, take the time to put your pen to paper and solidify the commitment to achieve your goals whether big or small, sign it and work towards it. Take the initiative and control your life and well being. Involve your friends, family and spouse because a journey walked together will bring you closer.

Our goal for this year should be healthy well-being!! Inside and Out!!!

    Advice & Beyond...  

@Looking_Within